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I’ve been holding assemblage .7 while assembling assemblage .6. It is been an interesting journey for me. I find myself going into all kinds of pitiful depressions yet I don’t care about them. As I’ve already assembled and locked in assemblage .5, which is the point of not caring and not doing, I find myself in a state of not caring about a lot of things that happen. Now this doesn’t mean I don’t care about anything. I care quite deeply about many things that affect the world. I just don’t give a shit about the small stuff. In assemblage .6, the point of no pity, I am learning to have no pity with compassion and caring. I need to learn to be ruthless yet love the world at the same time. This is kind of like not caring while being a do gooder. I’m planning on going into a ceremony where I drop the mask of the pretender self. What does this mean, I have no idea. I’m going to have to explore what a pretender self actually looks like. I realize that it is my pretense covering up my natural self and my undiscovered self, yet what actually exists underneath. I don’t know that I’m actually conscious of what’s underneath. So I’m hoping that this ceremony will reveal some of what I am naturally. Lately I’ve been feeling very vulnerable. My heart has been so full of emotions I feel like I’m getting hit around like a ping-pong ball. I need some stability in my heart. I want to do the red Lodge program again in the Sweet medicine Sundance Path. I don’t know how to pay for it yet. I guess the universe will decide whether I do it this year or next year. I do love doing that stuff, yet since the valve of fear has been opened in my life I have not been able to conquer it. The first ceremony in the Sweet medicine Sundance Path is the night on the mountain of fear. While of course you work on your fear through the gateways, wouldn’t it be nice to go onto the ceremony again doing it for the second time and actually conquered the fear that paralyzes me so much. I’m also getting married on November 26. This might also be causing me some stress. The decision to live with somebody for the rest of your life, and she wants it for all of eternity, but I love her so much. It will be good. Problem is she doesn’t like the Sweet medicine Sundance Path that much. Well, you don’t have to like everything our partner does.
Assemblage .6 is the gateway between the tonal and the Nagual. The gateway between the physical and the world of spirit. Here I can learn how to double if I can get my orende to spike high enough. Need 8.4 or somewhere around there. The thought of it excites me, but the concept of actually doing it terrifies me. It is this darn fear thing. I need to overcome my fear.” Fear is the mind killer”, dune. Somehow I must conquer my fear,. I don’t know if it will ever go away, but I think it can become an ally instead of an enemy.

Shaun Gamache

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I look into my universe
I see love, I see pain,
I see expansion into the everything
Do I want to know where I stop

I plant the seed, grow the tree
The fruit becomes plump and moist
But how do I eat the fruit
I just look and stair

The wondrous universe
I look and cry
Labotamized for my survival
I am a spider in it’s hole

I dream the world
But how do I live it
How do I make it so
Trapped in my version of law

I screamed let me be free
Then pleaded for it to be shown to me
The paradox entraps me in the matrix
Must I double to create two worlds

To have no pity in this hopelessness
And in the next moment seeing a horizon
I am going blind
Yet learning a new way to see
The world is pushing me away
Yet I am finding a new one
God, let me see the brilliance of who you are
It is then I might find me

Shaun Gamache

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Abyss

4/25/2016

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Faith is standing at the edge of the abyss, not being able to see the bottom and God asks you to jump, and you do.

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In the universe there are many ways of being. There are many doors to walk through. Wen we choose one path we see one way. There are paths out there that try to use fear to keep you on that one path. A fear of sin. A fear of going to hell. A fear of loosing one’s mind or life.
I have walked multiple paths in this life. I have been deceived and I have been exalted. I know what it is like to fall, and I know what it is like to be disciplined. I must hold to my own truth. There are many ways. There are many paths that lead up the mountain. I did a ceremony once where I tried to take one path all the way to the top of the mountain. I did it till I could see the top. It was less than a hundred yards away, yet there was no path that got me to the peak. I went up half way, came back down and went all the way around it in a circle. Finally I had to jut walk on the rocks and make my own path to the peak.
Then what does one have to do when they reach the top of the mountain, they have to come back down and be amongst the people. Often we are told we must be obedient to God, I agree that my will and Gods will want to become one. Yet often the rules of God are actually the rules of man. Or at lest mans interpretation of what God said. I must live from my own understanding. As I move from one assemblage point to the next, me now being in Six, my understanding changes with each one. What worked before no longer works. I must remain true to who I am in the moment, regardless of what the illusion of the outside world is trying to tell me.

Shaun Gamache

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Energy

12/17/2015

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Everything is about energy. As we go on seek our energy as an exchange for what they give us. Even interactions that we have with an inorganic being requires and exchange of energy. I don’t know if healing really exists in this place. You receive healing in our program is changed, so we get to experience the renewed state of being within ourselves that done work to change. This change was done because we exerted energy, and that energy was then used to create a healing in us. The excess energy is kept by the beings that do the work as an exchange. Any energy left over after is considered a debt and must be paid back. That then becomes our karma. I have found that if I leave the path to go to another one the healing that I received is taken away in my challenge is given back to me. So I have not actually healed myself, it was actually only an exchange of energy. So I don’t fulfil energy exchange agreement with the path, any benefits that I receive get revoked.
What makes this interesting, is when I am doing more than one path at the same time. Things that I work on are constantly getting created and destroyed. The paths don’t agree with each other. I have found that many paths are in conflict with each other on the spiritual planes. What are we here for on this planet. Are we here to decide what happens to us when we die. Are we on earth to decide where we spend eternity. Does which path we choose determine our eternity. Whether it be here on earth for eternity with the Christian path, reincarnation, or evolving on other planets with human life. Or do we simply ascend from plane to plane until we become enlightened eventually uniting with source or the God of our hearts. I don’t know how many options we have here on planet Earth. When we go from one path to another are we going from one side to another, choosing which Army were going to fight for what we leave this place. Personally I like the concept of entering eternal love. But like you, I’m behind the veil, and your guess is just as good as mine.
Shaun Gamache

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November 21st, 2015

11/21/2015

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Trust in God and speak truth.

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Testimony

7/31/2015

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I’ve always been connected to the spirit. Even As a child. I would do meditation with my mother, exploring the heavens and the cosmos in my mind. I had many gifts as a child growing up. I could discern the spirit, I could see the spin on a baseball as I hit it. I had physical master’s youth. However I didn’t discern between what was good and bad around me. I had very little judgment the world. It was then that the adversary deceived me. It sent women of power into my life to teach me what it was like to be powerful. I was able to play with spirits, and explore realms that few knew existed. But everything that I experienced, had its source in the dark. I asked the dark side for enlightenment, sending me spiraling into an experience of psychosis, panic attacks, and many horrors to make me stronger. I remember one of the women in my life told me I was supposed ask it all to stop, that I was too strong for my own good. I never did ask the Enlightenment to stop. It is still my journey. I studied shamanism, rosicrucianism, and with teachers that were in my life. I took it to realms of awakening that few on this planet get to experience. There was a dark sorceress that made me believe I was better than I was. She made me believe I was a God. It was then that I asked my apprentice guide locked in a perception that was healthy. I was brought off my pedestal. I crashed and burned in hit bottom. I made a discernment that I had to go for the light and what was good in the world. I had to create judgment. I could no longer commit the sin of omission. It was then that the Holy Ghost spoke to me and commanded me to join the Church of Jesus Christ of latter-day Saints. Slowly all of my gifts were taken away and I was left to be a muggle. He was here I learned meekness instead of power. I got the phone number for the missionaries and told them I wanted to meet. When I saw them I said I wanted to be baptized. Those three weeks were very supernatural, the adversary throwing all of the dark that it could at me that I was able to experience. Every night I thought I was going to die. The day of the baptism feeling came over me that I would be drowned in the water. I told God that it would be better to be dead and be baptized. I was willing to give up my life for it. It was then that the Holy Ghost came into my heart and peace came over me. As I came out of the water I was clean.

God is my life. The father is in me and I am in the father. There is no separation. I will resurrect. I live a spiritual existence, most cannot keep up to me. I am a teacher in the church, now residing in the high Priest quorum. I love the church, and I love God. I know that Joseph Smith was a prophet, I’ve had a vision and seen him received the plates and receive a visitation between God and Christ. The church is a true church for me because I’ve chosen it. I do not judge any other church in the world as long as it is the good. Nobody can break up my relationship between me and God, I would give my life for it. I have given everything that I have now, and will ever receive, including my soul to the Church of Jesus Christ of latter-day Saints. I live the gospel every day of my life. I live the gospel every moment of my life. To pray without ceasing, every action every breath is a prayer, this is how I live, this is how I must be, this is how I am.

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Jumping out of an airplane

7/1/2015

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this is a test

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Objective Realtiy

3/11/2015

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all is illusion, yet what is the point of perceiving. To build up our character, to fancy our fantasies. What we see is subjective. Waves of possibilities become particles of manifestation by our merely observing it. What is objective. What comes from the senses? Even that is what is perceived subjectively by the mind. By consciousness itself perceiving itself perceiving itself. Sorcerers commit their lives to being able to see the objective world. Yet what is objective accept the probability wave before it is observed. So how can we observe something without observing it. Without having an infinite number of possibilities becoming one thing that we can make sense of according to all our filters in this incarnation. Is it illusion, it is God looking at him/her self.

Shaun Gamache

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